Today, while logging onto my laptop and listening to the local news, I kept hearing "Bonfiglio... Bonfiglio... Bonfiglio..." until I decided to glance at the screen to see who was mispronouncing Bonfiglio and what Bonfiglio was doing... as it would turn out, it was my first cousin Antoinette's son Peter, splattered all over the local news, because he got into an altercation with the Hollywood Police and was shot in the stomach. He is the same age as my eldest son and lived with me briefly after his mother died of a heroine overdose in 2005... Seven months after my brother died in a fatal car accident. Peter has made the headlines many times since 2005... Each time I have wondered if he is on a suicide mission and his antics become increasingly more brazen and more sensational. He was arrested at 19 for threatening President Bush, and later for impersonating an FBI agent. If he wasn't mentally deranged, he would be brilliant.
So why do I say "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff" today of ALL days? Because in the grand scheme of things, Peter's behavior does not reflect me or have anything to do with me outside of the fact that his mother was my first cousin and we are related through blood. I decided to focus, not on Peter, but on his brothers and the family and specifically on his twin brother, Joey.
Joey was a Police Officer. He is the polar opposite of Peter. He is the one that has to live and to deal with the fact that his twin brother is insane and repeatedly being placed on suicide watch and institutionalized. I would even venture to say, that on some level, Joey may even be questioning his own sanity right now and praying that he is not adversely affected by his brother's behavior. Who wouldn't?
So, here I am, ready to report that after my uncle's hand surgery yesterday and Peter's incident, that I did not stick to my nutrition plan but I did work out today and I am not going to be bent out of shape over eating two tacos, scoops w/ salsa, rice and refried beans w/ cheese.
It was good!
I was raised on Mexican food and every once in a while, I will be damned if I don't eat a tortilla or have a taco to go w/ my Pico de Gallo! I loaded my plate with LOTS of lettuce, Pico de Gallo, onions, and jalapenos and then I added some taco meat and a doll-up of crema. Que rico!
No pictures, no calorie counting, and I even had a Coke Zero and a Dove Bar! Now THAT's the killer!!! I did not fast today, and God knows, TODAY was the BEST day to start it but it starts NOW.
I DID work out though- I rebounded for 30 minutes, stepped for 15 minutes, and jogged for 55 minutes and 18 seconds @ 4.0, non- stop... I really need to adjust the belt on my treadmill though so I can do 7.0 - 10.0 MPH. Right now, it is just too unstable and I have to drive to the gym if I want to sprint at 2 minute intervals at a speed higher than 5.0 MPH.
This being said, It's sweat off my back! I will fast until Sunset Sunday and then focus on what I can fix and I can control and manipulate, me... Anything and anyone else, for now, is dust in the wind.
100 years from now, it will not matter... What matters is how I live my life, not who I am or who I am related to or what people think of me or what people think about who I am related to. I just want to focus on what I can do to better myself and my community, my environment, and leave my children and my descendents a better blueprint than the one that was left for me.
